The Pig and the Pick-up

Did I forget to mention that there is a Golf-pro Shop around the corner from Barbados? Nobody at Barbados plays golf... but kamal longs to visit the Pro Shop. The woman at the counter is another possible date. She is quite cute. She is not central in anyway to the story, but to help establish Kamal's opportunism when it comes to beautiful women.

I noticed this woman in REAL life jere in TAipei (except that in real life, she is middle aged and very wrinkled). What is special about her is that if you ever wanted to meet her, it would be easy to come up with an initial topic of conversation since she ties her pet PIG in front of her shop every morning!

I think Kamal's opener would be to offer to cook her up a delicious candle-light dinner back at his place... PORK TENDERLOIN!

Tamika Muller

For a while... maybe still, Kamal thought she was the love of his life. She is an investment banker. He called her up for an apointment (wealth management) and was entranced by her soft velvety voice. He flirted a little on the phone just in case she was cute. SHE WAS!

Sweet voice, sweet face, sweet figure. She was slim with almost skinny legs and a big bust. Afro-Caribbean trhough and through. Her style: sharp and professional... pencil skirt and blazer, silk scarf, shiny pumps... all in navy blue... However, there is also a touch of something else a little more feminine/more promising: the shoes are always just a little too high, making her ankles look ever so fragile, and her lipstick is a little too fushia, reminding him of flowers... or tropical fruit. And the perfume wafting around her... Chanel! How fitting.

Anyway, after a very professional first meeting in her office at the bank, he decided he couldn't bank there (as it wouldn't do to have "his woman" know all about his finances.... or lack thereof). He moved to another bank and called her back for dinner, which she accepted. (Note that all this is in the past).

Anyway, in the end she was transferred to Offshore banking... and from Barbados to.... Okay, not sure where now... The following is a list of places I know to have Offshore Banking. Will research and choose:

• Angilla
• Antigua/barbuda
• Bermuda
• Belize
• Bahamas
• Cayman Islands
• Bristish Virgin Islands
• St. Lucia
• Turks & Caicos Islands

Korea Updates

Amy,
Thanks so much for all the great stories of Korea. I have decided that some of them will definately have to make an appearance. For those of you whjo didn't read the comments... the Korea stories are posted in the comments of the "Second Solicitation" entry.

The matching clothes in Cheju:
I was already thinking of having Tara have a small affair with Korea student who keeps pursuing her. They go to Cheju do... Why does she have to meet the only really cheap Korean guy... the one who expects her to pay? Anyway, it is Valentine's Day and it is a little sickening. When he buys matching shirts for them, he wants her to pay for hers! She doesn't really get to see Cheju though as they spend the time fighting about money and then the trip... and the affair is over.


Usury and English Prostitution
In addition, I have decided to add a few scenes with her Korean roommate (who can't wait to lave). The roommate is starting to feel guilty about how much she can't stand being in Korea... and about how much she is fleecing her parents' friends' for (for private lessons for their kiddies). Need to really emphasize the parental greed for their children to be the absolute best at everything.

Roommate feels like she is using the country of her parent's birth to make money... upon which she plans to leave without giving anything back. Tara on the other hand doesn't feel guilt, but rather shame. After all, she doesn't want to teach those extra private lessons (but like roommate, just can't get out of them... employees and acquaintances are good at guilting her inot them). So in a sense, she is an "English whore." She has to do something she can't stand for money! Not only that (and you, Amy, will know this is a true story), she has agreed to teach her dentist English in return for 2.5 years of orthodontic care - braces, retainers, tooth bleaching and all.

Leg-crossing in the Subway:
This happened to me too, you know? I had my leg whacked down by old lady's umbrella... This may make it in the novel only as a sympathy story to an even more outrageous one. Did you know that Anna actually got beaten up on the subway platform by some elderly person's umbrella. We will have to think of something she was doing wrong.

Latte
Maybe... more likely to write about Dunkin Donuts... Hee heee...

Deog/k: Duck or dog?
This is also good... ALthough if I tell this story, I have to let everyone know that NOT ALL KOREANS eat dog... and that it is no more barbarian than eating a lot of other things....

Name Changes

Okay... this may seem a little flakey, but I am about to change all the main characters' names (except for Lan Cho's) and add more characters in the next entry. This site is likely only to become a place for collecting ideas and the real writing will be more organized and placed in a different location in an easy to read and follow format... details to come. Anyway, the main characters are now named as follows:

 

Kamal Nadim Faiz (formerly Javed)

Why Kamal? It means beauty or perfection... which is something Kamal strives for, and seemingly attains...  (He also pursues beauty).

 

Tara Biquis Ismay (formerly Azeeza)

Let Tara serve as an Anglo spelling for Thara', meaning wealth. Wealth is something Tara has never strived for (or attained... at least not material wealth). However, weatlh disturbs her. It seems both abundance and lack thereof are situations to be ashamed of. She is often surrounded it seems by those with less than.... or those better off. In the course of the story, she will discover some truths about wealth... just as Kamal will discover some about beauty.

 

Christian Bell (formerly Bruce)

No real reason for this particular name change other  than it can be both short and masculin sounding: Chris, or longer and prettier. Bell is the Anglicization of Lebel. Chris likely goes by Chris Bell when out with friends, but is written up in food journals as Chef/Restauranteur Christian Lebel.

 

There are more characters to come, but in the meatime, I think I should work just a little on dialog. Chris still m,makes some small grammatical errors in speaking English and swears a lot. I will definately need a little help in identifying what kinds of errors French speakers (who are fairly proficient in English) might make when speaking English...

second solicitation

Hi all,

I know this is the second posting re: this issue... but I am soliciting teaching stories for ideas for my first attempt at fiction.

 

I have started developing ideas for the story which centers around a foreign guy living in Taiwan. He is a foreign guy already so imbued with ego that he remains unaffected by the particular disease that is caught by some foreign men on remaining in Asia for longer than 2 weeks (you know, the one where they think they are suddenly sex gods who need only to step into a bar or restaurant to be beset by a bevy of desireous babes). Our main character already knows the secret to attracting "desireous babes"... and his secret attraction factors are not of the type that dissipate even before the jetlag has worn off (when setting foot back on home turf).

 

Anyway, I haven't developed much re: the lesser, but still important story of Azeeza Bilquis.... English teacher in Korea! I didn't develop much re: her character or school life. What would be helpful would be stories that show the following:

• attitudes towards money/making it/spending it... 
• attitudes of host society towards the foreign teacher... (foreign resident)
• habits re: accumulation of stuff... how permanent does home in Korea feel?
• habits re: forming friendships...  how transient are relationships?
• ibid re: sex and love
• work ethics and relationships with teachers/students/parents, etc...

FINAL REQUEST... Although I love the name Bilquis, I no longer like the name Azeeza. Is this too foreign sounding? Think about it! Korean students can't pronounce some letters and substitute "j" for "z". Although that could be potentially cute... it isn't! (Ah -ji -ja). I would prefer a more common (but not too common) name. And also looking for a better name for Javed. Should I have opted for Omar? Or can you think of something better? Please post comments to this mail by visiting the site (http://zanmeibarbados.blogspot.com/) and clicking where it says 0 comments. Or try emailing it directly to the site to the address in the To field.

 

 

The Link to the 100 Day Novel Recipe

Sorry... In that last post, I forgot to give you the link to the site! Here it is... in case you'd also like to try writing the novel floating around in your head: How to write a novel in 100 days or less �X Day 1

How to write a novel in 100 days!

"How many people out there want to write a novel? Sinclair Lewis asked this at a writer's workshop. Then he said to all those whose hands shot up, "Ok, then why aren't you home writing one?" I guess no one is going to tell me how to string my ideas together, but it becomes more and more complicated everyday. Especially since what I want to write about is not exactly a story, but about ways in which we experience life... about the ironies of life. I want to write about the lighter side of loss, the frustrating sides of love, the struggles in forming identity... past vs present, logic vs. beliefs and superstition, values vs behaviour... guilt.... miscommunication, and the certainty of uncertainty re: everything we think we know.
So why is this post entitled "How to write a novel in 100 days?" This is an article I found on the internet outlining what to do for each of the 100 days. Already I have the 7th day wrong! It states that the story should start small... a little story that has a great meaning... and already I have a big complicated cast. It shouldn't be something that tries to accomplish everything...Today as an exercise, I think I should go home and write maps for my favorite novels and try to find the smaller thread in the big picture that really pulled at my interest when I read it.
To be truthful, I didn't read all 100 days becasue I have a new idea. I am thinking I should buy 6 of those 3-M sticky bulletin boards and put them on my walls at home. One is general... and the others are for the 4 countries involved: Taiwan, Korea, Canada, the US (mostly as a transfer point) and Barbados. Then I can get index cards and write about each of the charachters... background and characteristics for the general board... and then additional sets for each country, stating the character's purpose for being there. Of course some characters will have a role in all the countries, but some will be confined to one or two.
OK... these are my thoughts for today. Maybe I can give you a synopsis of my favorite novels tomorrow.

Teaching English in Korea

Dear friends,

Chapter 2 focuses on Azeeza... Hence, I am wondering if you wouldn't mind sending me stories of the wierdest, most interesting or most typical stories you have heard or experienced teaching english/living in Korea....

 

I can only think of a few that happened while I was there:

1. Elderly Lady in Subway Beats Gyopo teacher with Unbrella: Korean Australian teacher waiting for subway suffers and unprovoked attack by old lady with umbrella as her choice of weapon... or was it a man? (I was also hit by an elderly lady with an umbrella for crossing my legs in the subway).
2. Do you Speak Korean? Hearing this question from someone from whom you have just had an hour long conversation with... in KOREAN!
3. Local teacher Falls Asleep in Class: Have you ever "co-taught" a class where the local teacher sits in a chair in the back of the room and proceeds to sleep... and to add insult to injury... SNORE?
4. Foreign Teacher Teaches Student How to.... ! Don't know if this one was ever true, so we won't elaborate.
5. Class Disrupted for Fiming of Silly TV Game Show Filming: It is as it sounds... ONe of those shows where students compete against teachers... and classes against other classes.
6. IMF Crisis: Students' Fathers Lose Jobs, Mothers Donate Gold: Witness distress and patriotism.
7. Student Riots and Tear Gassings in MyongDong.
8. The Opening of the First Starbucks.
9. Edae Students Enjoy Dunkin Donuts for Breakfast: Mind you they eat nothing else for the rest of the day.
10. Secondary School Students Comits Suicide When HOT Star Injured at Concert.
11. Students Teach Foreign Teacher How to Make DOkkbokki.
12. Gyopo Teacher Topples Would Be Purse Thief: Guy on scooter grabs bag of Gypopo teacher as he drives by. She holds on and yanks guy from scooter. She then begins to beat him with her bag.
13. Teachers Forced into English Prostitution: Like it or not, many teachers are forced to teach private lessons by principals and other school higher ups. When they attempt to quit... Often subjected to hour long screaming fits.

Please add to this list.

 

Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend - re: Lan Cho

How is Lan Cho connected with Barbados? Javed loves women and is unsentimental in his relationships. Although he shares many intimate details of his life with "his women", he doesn't need to feel intimately connected to do this. These women are like therapists with fringes. Instead of paying cash, he gives gifts... usually jewelery.

We already know that Lan Cho is one such encounter. However, Lan's encounter with Javed, changes Lan's path as well. She is given the costly, but rather unsentimental impoersonal gift of a tennis bracelet. Lan understands that none of the cliches like "diamonds are forever" apply. her eyes register only stone cold cash.

Information acquired after an attempt to sell the jewelry in a diamond shop in NY (she is there leading another group of tourists - this time from the China mainland) is what finally takes her to the REAL Barbados.

There may be some interesting stories (true historical ones) in the novel: Barbados. The below excerpt is from Edward Jay Epstein's Book, "The Diamond Invention."

From: Chapter Twenty - Have you ever tried to sell a diamond?:

"Most jewelers would prefer not make a customer an offer that not only might be deemed insulting but would also undercut the widely-held notion that diamonds hold their value. Moreover, since retailers generally receive their diamonds from wholesalers on consignment and need not pay for them until they are sold, they would not readily risk their own cash to buy diamonds from customers. Rather than offer customers a fraction of what they paid for diamonds, retail jewelers usually recommend their clients to other firms
One frequently recommended is Empire Diamonds, on the 66th floor of the Empire State Building in midtown Manhattan. Empire's reception room, which resembles a doctor's office, is usually crowded with elderly women who sit nervously in plastic chairs waiting for their name to be called. One by one, they are ushered into a small examining room where an appraiser scrutinizes their diamonds and makes a cash offer. 'We usually can't pay more than 60 percent of the current wholesale price,' Jack Braud, the president of Empire Diamonds, explained. 'In most cases, we have to pay less since the setting has to be discarded and we have to leave a margin for error in our evaluation [especially if the diamond is mounted in a setting].' Empire removes the diamonds from their settings, which are sold as scrap, and resells them to wholesalers. Because of the steep markup on diamonds between the wholesale and retail levels, individuals who buy retail and, ;n effect, sell wholesale often suffer enormous losses on the transaction. For example, Braud estimated that a half-carat diamond ring that might cost $2,000 at a retail jewelry store could only be sold for $600 at Empire."

Fitness Center Notes

I think we should add some notes since I have not been writing.

In order to make Javed's working life more "true to life" I should be studying things that go on in the fitness club. Notes are re: things that happen in my Fitness Club in Taipei:

 

1. Elderly Man Dies in Jacuzzi: Trainer (Jimmy) was working late when he got a call from training desk. Seems one of the cleaning cleaning staff, on trying to rouse elderly man who spent a little toop long in the jacuzzi, was shocked to find him dead. Jimmy (along with other trainers on duty) needed to go and try to remove him. He was too heavy for cleaning staff to remove.
2. Electrical Fire: Left waiting outside in my gym gear (luckily NOT the teeny bikini like tops with matching aerobics bottoms favored by many TAiwanese women... not the towels of those caught in the shower) while fireman put out fire.  Passer-byers happy to stop and gawk. After fire was out, we were allowed to go through the aftermath in groups of 5/6 to retreive out stuff from out lockers. It took only 2 days for club to be up and running again. Not eally sure as to cause of fire... Suntanning area?
3. Weight Loss Methods Given by Korean Gym Goers: Water equals weight! Do not drink any water during or after exercise or you won't lose anything. Youshould wear workout clothes in windbreaker materials that will make you sweat. The more you sweat, the more you will lose! (Even better, wrap your arms, legs, middle or any fat areas in saran wrap before getting dressed as that will spot reduce those areas). Stay in the sauna for as long as possible. You can/should aromatherapy weight loss inducing oils before going into the sauna. These methods are not really practiced as much in TAIwan... In TAiwan, it is a more radical dieting approach that is taken... Chinese medicine, Western medicine (zenical is available over the counter!), massage therapy, skipped meals, liposuction, etc.
4. Sex in the Suntanning booth: This is only speculation. I saw a couple going into the suntanning booth together. The girl on duty expalined that men are less flexible; therefore, the guy needed his girlfriend to go in with him to apply the suntanning lotion.
5. Best Yoga Instructor left Gym to start her own Ashram: The instructor who walks on tiptoes, speaks in a hushed voice, and can bend herself into all sorts of pretzel-like positions (amazing to think she has given birth to twins) left to study her craft more seriously in the US. Anyway, after her return, it was only a matter of weeks before she enlisted the help of another instructor and opened her own ashram. Gone are the sounds of Buddhist chanting and gonging from the third floor aerobics room.
6. New Computerized System For Tracking Clients: All clients with trainers will have records kept in centralized computers. Reeive card which with they must clock in before and after sessions. (Before, only record was kept by trainer... most using thier own PDAs/Palm Pilots.)

 

Well, that is all I can think of for now. I am not sure which scenes will be set here... but I guess I should appoint a manager that will constantly be bothering Javed on his cell phone re: inconsequential goings on in the gym. IE... one of the cleanings staff is late, the vending machine is out of Pokari Sweat, a client wants a discount on training, someone's gym locker broken into.... etc. I guess I will have to find out about how to license a business in a foreign country. Who can own a business etc...(Can foreign people own land/property/businesses?) Does Javed have an untrustworthy business partner in Taipei?

Chapter 1: a general map

BACK to drawing board! The info below (in the blockquote) makes me think I need to do a lot more reading, research on I-ching before i can even write the first paragraph. I will be scrapping para 2 and do this research. But I can write down my general map. SKip to below the quoted part to read about the events of the first chapter.

Reading the I Ching involves casting coins or yarrow stalks to build a series of 6 lines called a "hexagram". Each line is either Yin (the passive or feminine force) or Yang (the active or masculine force). The resulting hexagram is then looked up in the I Ching itself, to yield a passage describing what each of the 6 lines means. There are 64 possible hexagrams, each of which can be further broken down into groups of 3 lines called "trigrams". One of the most fascinating aspects of I Ching readings is that each line in the present hexagram may be old, indicating that it is about to change from Yin to Yang or vice versa - by inverting each of these changing lines, we can generate a hexagram depicting the immediate future. Key: Lines are numbered from 1 at the bottom to 6 at the top. Divided lines are Yin and undivided lines are Yang. Black lines are new (unchanging) and gray lines are old (changing). Interpretation: I Ching readings can be challenging to interpret, precisely because they paint a very complete picture of the situation. Notably, each of the 6 lines of the reading describes a specific individual, and the outcome of their endeavor. This is what makes the I Ching so unique and powerful - where Tarot or Runes may give you an understanding of your circumstances, the I Ching actually gives you an understanding of your OPTIONS. You will find the I Ching easier to interpret if you consider that it was written in ancient China, and think of the more peculiar expressions in that context. For example, our favorite anachronistic term is "efficacious tortoise" - a reference to the food of a wealthy man, similar to the meaning of "live Maine lobster" to many modern Americans. Translation: The most commonly used English translation of the I Ching (also known as the Yi Jing) was by Cary Baynes in 1951, from a German translation by Richard Wilhelm in 1923 - though very poetic and beautiful to read, it suffers not only from being a translation of a translation, but from Wilhelm's infusion of Christian values into the Confuscian text. To avoid these problems, the version of the I Ching we use is based on the oldest scholarly English translation, by James Legge in 1882 (and yes, our version IS protected by copyright). The grammar and spelling has been modernized slightly, but the words and meaning are very true to the original Chinese text. For example, you will note many references to a "superior man", "proper conduct", "looking above", or "looking below" - the ageless Chinese concepts of formal role within society and of the specific behavior appropriate to that role.

Chapter 1 PARAPHRASED:

Instead of talking about Taipei and Barbados (the club), we are going to go to talk about the history behind Javed's tattoo... the one that is itching and tingling after his 12 minute suntan. It happened in Victoria BC during a late afternoon/early evening. Javed meets a cute waitress in a restaurant (sushi?) where he is having a late lunch (which is basically dinner) and convinces her to sit with him. She is foreign student working illegally at her distance relative's friend's restaurant. Javed is too young for her, but he is cute, so she tells his fortune as a way to hold his hand. She has no idea what she is doing, so she makes up a lot of gibberish based on the fact that his hands are cold: He should move to a hot country... or go into business making chocolates - all stuff that would be better suited to his best friend Bruce. He accuses her of being a fraud and she decided to take him to a real fotune teller... not ready to let him go yet, but regretting she started all this fortune telling nonsense.

They go to place behind a Chinese medicine shop.... past dried deer antlers, powdered tiger testicles, bear gall bladders, snake bile and all sorts of bitter smelling powders and potions. Little old bespectacled man in white T-shirt. On the table in front of him are volumes of books with characters and charts that look kind of like dictionaries, a student's study lamp and a magnifying glass. He is sipping fragrant tea from thimble sized cup. The place is littered with such cups, little teapots, jars of dry rice, etc etc. He asks about preferred method of prophesy... (Wonder if being able to tell future and using more than one method makes you master of none? I know some tellers in TAiwan use a method of counting grains of rice). Javed opts for the I-ching reading.

HERE IS THE PROBLEM... it would seem that I need to do more research on fortune telling and the I-ching. When I go to Vancouver, I will have to visit Chinatown to find out what methods are available, how I-ching is done (have a reading done to see what it is like). I also would need a teller to tell me what could be derived from the 26th hexagram... Need to fill in the past (the upside down hexagram?) too. I would hate it if some reader who knows about the I-ching were to say the details were completely ridiculous and unauthentic. Unfortunately all my fortune telling experiences were not using I-ching.

Anyway, Javed gets the reading... the teller fills in some wierd details of his past: some parts are bizarrely accurate and some parts are too wierd to be true... about people who know him, but he doesn't know, plotting and deception at home. Things about his sibling (he doesn't have any) and other stuff. Still skeptical, he laughs... and then something happens (I will tell you what after I have researched the I-ching and the significance of the first line more carefully). It is a little creepy that the first prophesy has already come true... and only within minutes of leaving the shop.

He dumps the girl and goes to tattoo parlor to have the charachter printed into his flesh. Actually, he has trouble remembering numbers. He now wants to remember the prophesy, but is afraid of confusing the 26th with the 62nd or some such thing. He decides to tattoo the characters though instead of the number 26. . (Incidentatlly, to those from countries other than mainland China, the characters have little meaning as the second character is not commonly in use. It rather looks like the meaningless characters that Westerners tattoo to themselves because it looks cool... or the weird English slogan's young Japanese girls wear emblazoned across their T-shirts).

Then he drops by his best friend's resturant/bar to have a drink and recount his bizarre story. At this point Lan Cho walks into the bar... but we don't recognize her yet. Bruce follows her and Javed is left to his own devices. He slips behind the bar to help Bruce and chats with a visiting South African residing in Barbados... before the night is over, he has received a business proposal that will change his future.

Flash back to the present where Javed has completed his workout and is leaving the gym... He stops for breakfast as Lan Cho is herding a group of Japanese tourists into a hotel... There is a flash of ??? (not quite recognistion, but something)....

NEXT SCENE: Azeeza... She is receiving a prophesy of a different sort from her insipid lover... They are having lazy morning drinking coffee in hotel room. "And after I get out of her, I'm gonna... and you can... And we will.... etc"

Omnipotent Third Person?

Dilemma! Now I want to write about what happens to Javed (he needs a new name by the way), but I am not sure about the narrative. I don't want to use the first person narrative because that puts me too close... I also don't believe I have the skill or knowledge of the male psyche to write from a man's perspective. In addition, when seemingly tragic things happen, I don't want to get bogged down in those emotions.

But neither do I want to be omnipotent third person narrator and talk about how all the characters feel. I hope the reader can infer much of how the characters are feeling without my having to write about them...
I am starting to think I should be taking a creative writing course while fleecing out the details.

Another problem: dialog... I am realizing that while I may be able to learn to write descriptive passages, I am likely to encounter difficulties with dialog. Can I ofset some of this by writing in vignettes? I will post the entire first vignette soon (and all in one post so you need not read from the bottom up) for your reading pleasure. Please be sure and send feedback. I am not afraid of words like "stilted", "contrived", or "wordy"- So long as the criticism is constructive.